Ask the Cats

Aspen Johnson

Here at the Farm Store, we have two store cats. One of them has been with us for quite a while, and that's Ninja. (He's the large grey cat that people often mistake for a statue when he sits on the Capital Press newspapers.) The other cat, Jynx, has not been with us as long as Ninja has (and no, he's not pregnant, it's just "fluff.") Jynx is the smaller black cat that I sometimes call "Jynx the Speed bump" because he likes to lay in the middle of the floor for people to trip over him.

Ninja Jynx
Ninja (left) and Jynx (above) looking handsome in their bow ties.


So I decided to ask them some questions:

Me: How's it going?

Cats: Good, it's good. Free food, a place to sleep, people to pet us, you know, the usual. 

Me: That's good to hear, what's the absolute best part of the day?

Ninja: The best is when Travis comes in and holds me and loves on me.

Jynx: When I come up with the perfect plan to take over the world, but then someone comes in and pets me and I decide it's not so bad after all. But if a dog comes in? That's it! Dog destroying time!

Me: Oh, alright then, so how's the summer going for you guys?

Cats: It's nice, we have people here to wait on us hand and foot. People to let us in and out and it's also not raining, so that's a huge plus.

Me: So what do you do in the winter, when it is raining?

Cats: Sleep under our heat lamp and avoid outdoors at all costs.

Me: Your heat lamp? You mean the light for the jewelry case? (AKA the "tanning bed")

Cats: No, it's our heat lamp. We jump up there and sleep. Occasionally we fight and then one of us goes to sleep on the pants.

Me: So that's where the fur comes from, you know how difficult that is to remove?

Cats: So? Sounds like your problem, not ours.

Me: Umm... Alright, next question are you good hunters?

Jynx: Nope, not at all.

Ninja: Yes, but I'll spit it out if it doesn't take like catnip.

Me: So, Jynx, I've heard that you like to chase people to the toilet?

Jynx: What toilet? You mean the throne I sit upon to plan my world destruction? You aren't supposed to be in there!

Me: Oh, I see, I'm sorry to invade your secret lair then. 

Jynx: You better be.

Jynx guarding the toilet

Me: So, Ninja, I hear you like dog food?

Ninja: Who told you that? It was that raccoon in the warehouse, I have no idea what you're talking about.

Me: So when we leave you inside at night, a raccoon gets inside the store and rips open the bags?

Ninja: Yes.

Rocket the Raccoon

Me: Well, that looks like all I time for. Thanks guys, I guess I'll see you around.

Cats: Yeah, sure, but first, can you feed us?

As always and until next time,
Aspen Johnson

Photos and video of Jynx and Ninja courtesy of Haley Zimmerman
Photo of "Rocket the Raccoon" courtesy of Travis Soverns at The Farm Store

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